Republicans are dirty stinking liars

But it's okay if you're a Republican

The Grand Old Party sends out inspirational e-mail to its loyal troops. In addition to providing helpful talking points that try to make the Bush administration look like something other than an utter failure, the GOPUSA Eagle includes carefully chosen think-pieces by sophisticated conservative analysts. The September 4 installment of the Eagle borrows its subject line from a recent editorial column by Doug Patton, a fellow who writes regularly for publications like Human Events (which tells you most of what you need to know about Patton's extremist politics).

Patton's article tries to advance the Republican talking point that the GOP is more sensitive to moral considerations than the dreadfully sleazy Democrats. This may be a surprise to you if you have noticed the steady march of indicted, convicted, resigned, and/or disgraced Republican office holders. No doubt we are victims of an illusion fostered by the liberal mainstream media, whose reporters cannot resist attacking such sterling public servants as Larry Craig, David Vitter, John Sweeney, Don Sherwood, Ed Schrock, Mark Foley, Randy Cunningham, Bob Ney, Scooter Libby, and John Doolittle. Good thing that Patton is here to provide some perspective and balance, even if he has to reach back decades to pad out his list of Democratic miscreants.

Being A Democrat Means Never Having To Say You're Sorry

By Doug Patton
September 4, 2007

Since the details of Idaho Sen. Larry Craig's disgusting restroom antics came to light, comparisons and contrasts of scandals involving Republicans versus Democrats have been made by almost every pundit with a political ax to grind.

Liberal commentators love to characterize Craig's tormented secret life and his traditional positions on issues such as same sex marriage as "hypocrisy," while conservatives point out that Craig has a right to take those positions regardless of his personal proclivities.

These views miss the point. While conservative Republicans have to live and die politically by the moral standards most Americans believe to be a reasonable code of personal behavior, Democrats have no standards for personal conduct. The litany of Dems who have thumbed their noses at decency in the name of political survival is long indeed.

President Bill Clinton refused to resign from office and served out the remainder of his term despite his crimes.

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Excuse me there, Doug, but “crimes”? I admit that I admire the sly plural, but it's a fact that Clinton was not convicted of anything. No crime, hence no crimes. Sorry.

Sen. Ted Kennedy has been elected to seven more six-year terms since driving off that bridge at Chappaquiddick in a drunken stupor and leaving Mary Jo Kopechne to drown.

Rep. Gerry Studs, the first openly homosexual Member of Congress, had sex with male pages and then defiantly stayed in the House with the approval of his constituents and his Democrat colleagues.

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Yes, Ted Kennedy permanently blotted his escutcheon by his behavior back in 1969 and he'll be atoning for that until his last breath. By the way, you forgot to mention that he afterward lost his leadership position (majority whip) in the Democratic caucus. No doubt an inadvertent oversight on your part. If you had remembered, I'm sure you would have pointed it out, although it undermines your thesis that Democrats celebrate and reward irresponsible behavior.

You're also indulging your penchant for pluralism again, Doug. “Pages”? Gerry Studds admitted to a legal and consensual relationship in 1973 with a page (one page) who was 17 at the time of the liaison. Since the page had attained the age of consent under state law, there was no question of criminality. The House of Representatives, however, did censure Studds for an inappropriate relationship (inasmuch as Studds was the page's superior), and removed him from his committee chairmanship. He objected to the censure but did not appeal, citing his wish to protect the anonymity of his young partner (whose name remains unknown). It may not have been the congressman's finest hour, but it's something of a contrast to the peculations and scandals of today's Republican newsmakers.

Rep. Barney Frank hired a male prostitute with public funds, then looked the other way while his “aide” turned the congressman's home into a male brothel. Frank is now chairman of the powerful House Banking Committee.

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Hey, we're up to 1990 now! Patton is almost current in his account of Democratic disgrace. The record shows that Frank did meet Steve Gobie via an escort service, which indeed makes Gobie a prostitute (much like the notorious reporter Jeff Gannon, who was somehow given White House access by the Bush administration). Frank hired Gobie as an aide, which did involve the use of public funds (since Gobie thereby became the employee of a public servant). You should have been more careful in your writing, Doug, because readers could have inferred that Frank was using public funds to pay for sexual services, instead of simply having found a job for someone he befriended. It also worth noting that the House Ethics Committee did not find any evidence that Frank knew of Gobie's use of his home to continue his work as a professional escort. That's not quite the same as saying that Frank “looked the other way.” A good writer should be more careful about such nuances, don't you think? That's a cute closing shot, though, where you point out that Frank chairs the House Banking Committee seventeen years after his congressional reprimand in the Steve Gobie matter. How quickly the Democrats moved to elevate an able and senior colleague!

Rep. Mel Reynolds was pardoned by his fellow deviant Bill Clinton after having sex with female pages.

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Hmm. Doug sure loves him some plurals! Frankly, I no longer trust anything he says. At least with Mel Reynolds he's managed to find a Democrat who actually got convicted of a crime. About time. And did you notice that President Clinton has now progressed from supposedly committing “crimes” to being a sexual deviant? I wonder how long Patton has regarded a lusty heterosexuality as deviance? Perhaps Patton envies the former president those hummers.

Remember Congressman William Jefferson, Democrat-Louisiana? The FBI found $90,000 in cash in his freezer last year. He's still in Congress.

Remember the videotape of Congressman Jack Murtha, Democrat-Pennsylvania, discussing a future bribe during the 1980 ABSCAM sting? He's still in Congress.

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Okay, it's clear that Doug Patton is just a political hack with a bent toward partisan propaganda, but his desperate scrambling about is just getting sad. The embarrassing William Jefferson is under indictment, but has yet to be convicted. He's in Congress because his constituents re-elected him last year. Since he's considered innocent until proven guilty, he gets to stay there for the time being. Jefferson is, of course, under a dark cloud and the House Democrats under Nancy Pelosi's leadership have denied him a seat on the Ways and Means Committee pending the outcome of the criminal accusations against him. These are the Democrats that Patton accuses of coddling their wayward party members.

The comment about Jack Murtha is probably the most vile and disgusting smear in Patton's entire article. Murtha was recorded discussing a bribe, all right, because the FBI videotaped him rejecting it. When approached in an FBI sting by people wishing to offer him bribes, Murtha's reaction was to let them down easy and try to direct them toward legitimate business investments in his congressional district that would benefit his constituents. I think I know why his constituents have continued to re-elect him.

This is how Patton makes his case that Democrats disdain decency and morality: He lies.

Republicans, on the other hand, are held to a higher benchmark, and rightly so. It is one we who believe in decency and traditional values have set for them, and one to which we should continue to hold them. Is it fair that Larry Craig is forced to resign from the Senate on the strength of such flimsy evidence? Not when held up to the Democrats' non-standard, but that is not our measure.

Should Barney Frank and Ted Kennedy be wearing orange jump suits at the Massachusetts state prison instead of attempting to destroy the Constitution on a daily basis in the U.S. Congress? Of course, but as your mother probably told you, if you are looking for fairness in this world, son, you are likely to be disappointed.

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And by a deft sleight of hand, Patton has transformed Barney Frank and Ted Kennedy into criminals—despite the absence of criminal convictions. Smooth. It must be the Democrats' fault that they aren't felons. And Republicans are now defending the Constitution from the evil Democrats? Good one!

We think there are lines over which we will not allow our public officials to cross. Going clear back to Watergate, Sen. Barry Goldwater led the Republican delegation to the White House to inform President Richard Nixon that he had to resign. From then until last week, when Republican leaders told Larry Craig there was no room for his behavior in the U.S. Senate, the GOP has been policing its own.

By contrast, we all remember Democrat congressional leaders circling the wagons around Bill Clinton as he lied through his teeth (to the public and under oath) about his disgusting behavior.

Quite simply, being a Democrat means never having to say you're sorry.

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And being a Republican means you can string together a bunch of lies and call it an argument in favor of morality.

Hey, Doug, you forgot to mention David Vitter, who admitted to patronizing prostitutes. When is he going to resign?

By the way, where is the Barry Goldwater of today? Who will go to the White House and tell President Bush to stop violating the U.S. Constitution with warrantless wiretaps or by disregarding the principle of habeas corpus? Do any of today's Republicans really care about the rule of law? There is precious little evidence that they do.

In the interests of fairness, I should probably point out that GOPUSA does not specifically endorse Doug Patton's intemperate screed. While they may have chosen to bring it to the attention of their readers in one of their e-mail bulletins (as the lead article, no less), the opinions contains in Patton's article are Patton's alone. There is an explicit disclaimer to this effect at the end of the GOPUSA copy of the article:

Note—The opinions expressed in this column are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the opinions, views, and/or philosophy of GOPUSA.

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But remember: they're dirty stinking liars.